When I Needed Them Most
by x snow-pony x
Summary: After a hectic few days at the DG things get too much for Tracy, and she needs someone there to help her. Thankfully Mike is there like always to look after her during the tough times.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N I'm bored and feel like writing. Enjoy. :-)**

 **Tracy POV**

I couldn't stop crying.

I was sat in the toy cupboard, the door locked so no one else could get in, my knees up to my chest, sobbing.

And the light had just gone out.

Everything had been too much recently. The atmosphere at Elm Tree for the past few days had been tense, and every time I did something slightly wrong for one of the kids they got annoyed with me, when all I was doing was trying my best to make them happy.

And the rest of the time no one spoke to me.

Cam wasn't at home, Mike and Gina were too busy to notice me, and the kids had more important things to do.

And finally, something had had to give.

And that something was me.

And that was why I was here now.

I sniffled, trying to comfort myself. I'd learnt over the past few days that my own company would be the only company I was going to get.

Well, it was better than nothing at least.

I heard Gina's voice through the house, calling everyone for dinner, but I didn't move. I wasn't hungry anyway, and I didn't fancy sitting with a load of people that didn't really want me there.

I was better off by myself.

* * *

It was about ten minutes later when I heard my name being called.

I shut out the sound, pulling my knees closer, curling up so I felt safe, and to try and stop my anxiety.

To be honest, it wasn't really working.

"Tracy!" I recognised Mike's voice, and heard a hint of annoyance. "Tracy, you're missing dinner!"

It only took him a minute or so to get to the toy cupboard, and he tried the door.

"Tracy?" he said. "Are you in there?"

"Leave me alone," I said.

There was a moment of silence.

"Tracy," Mike's voice was much gentler this time. "Open the door for me."

He must have heard the tears in my voice.

"I said go away," I said.

More silence. Mike was probably trying to work out whether to take my instruction, or whether to stay.

There was some rustling from outside the door, before Mike spoke again.

"Can you please open the door, Trace?"

Trace.

He hadn't used that in a while.

I shook my head, even though I knew full well he couldn't see it, before I let out another sob.

"What's wrong?" Mike asked.

I took a deep breath to steady my voice. "Like you care! You haven't spoken to me all week!"

Mine was quiet for a moment, before he spoke again. "I spoke to you yesterday," he said. "I spoke to you for quite a while."

"Yeah, but only about staff stuff," I said. "And Gina was there too. You haven't even said hello without me saying it first."

There was such a long silence I thought Mike had left.

"And you haven't listened to me either," I said. "I've been feeling like this all week, but when I've tried to talk to you you've just been too busy to hear what I have to say."

"If you open the door we can talk about it properly," said Mike. "And I'm assuming you want a hug, by the crying I can hear."

"And why would you do that?" I asked.

"Because I care about you," said Mike. "I don't want you to be upset."

"Everyone says that, but they never show it," I said. I was talking about Cam at this point too. She wasn't around at the moment, when I needed her most.

And it hurt.

"Well if you come out I'll show you I care," said Mike. "Because even though things have been a bit off this week, doesn't mean I don't still care about you the way I always have."

I let out another sob, not sure of what to do. I wanted Mike, wanted a hug from someone who cared about me and loved me, but at the same time I just wanted him to go away and leave me alone.

"Can you open the door?" asked Mike.

I didn't say anything for a few moments, just crying, before I spoke. "Go away. I don't want to talk to you."

There was more silence.

"Trace?" said Mike softly. "Open the door."

I paused for a few moments, before I reached up and turned the key. Mike stood up and slowly opened the door. I looked down at the floor to avoid his gaze.

"You want a hug?" asked Mike.

I gave a small nod, but I didn't move.

Mike walked towards me, before he knelt down on the floor next to me and wrapped his arms around me.

I crumbled. The emotional exhaustion suddenly caught up with me, and as Mike hugged me tightly I closed my eyes, tears still rolling down my cheeks.

"I do still care about you," Mike said. "And I'm sorry about these past few days. I should have listened to you."

I just continued to sob.

"Do you want to tell me now?" asked Mike. When I didn't answer, he added, "I'm not leaving until you want me to."

I took a shaky breath before I answered him. "I've just been feeling lonely and unwanted."

"Why?" asked Mike.

"Everyone else has got better things to do than spend time with me," I said. The kids hate me, they've been getting annoyed with me all week, some of the shouting at me, and it's just like no one actually wants me around."

Mike was silent for a moment. "No one hates you," he said. "They're just all not going through a great time at the moment, and they just happen to be projecting their anger and frustration and whatever else they're feeling onto you. It's not really anything to do with you or anything you've done."

"What about you?" I asked.

Mike sighed. "I've just been busy trying to sort things out," he said. "I don't know, I just, keep getting caught up in things and then don't have the time to do anything else." He paused for a moment. "And I'm sorry about that. It wasn't fair on you."

"It's OK," I said. "I'm sorry for getting upset about it."

Mike gave me a smile. "There's no need to be sorry," he said. "You're allowed to be upset." He paused for a moment. "But I'm here for you now, and you don't need to be sad anymore." He gently dried my tears. "I'm not leaving, yeah?"

I gave a small smile, before I rested my head on his shoulder.

Everything was going to be OK.

* * *

I woke with a jolt.

I looked around my room, trying to work out what had happened.

And then I realised.

It had all been a dream.

I sighed as I rolled over, wishing it had been real.

I needed that hug so much.

As I looked at my clock I realised I still had hours left to sleep, so I closed my eyes to try and get some more rest before I went to work.

Work.

Where I'd see Mike.

I'd talk to him when I got there.

Hopefully he'd be just as caring as in my dream.

Part of me believed he would be (he was Mike, after all), but part of me doubted it.

If I got annoyed at Mike, he'd be more likely to tell me off and leave than he would be to stay and hug me.

I sighed.

I'd see what happened in the morning.

And that was the last thought I had before I cried myself to sleep.

 **A/N Well, I've never written and ending like that before. As I was writing it it all seemed a bit idealistic, so I thought of that idea to make it more realistic, and I like it. Hope you liked it too. Please review. :-)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N This story was originally going to be a one-shot (which is why I didn't write any more), but I liked Linneagb's review and what she said about how she would like the event to eventually turn out, and it's a good idea and I feel like writing it so why not? Hope you enjoy it. :-)**

 **I also have to thank Tbr and Maleeha for reviewing. All the reviews made me so happy! :-D**

 **Tracy POV**

As I got into work the next morning my heart was pounding in my chest. I was planning on telling Mike how I felt, and, as much as I believed he still cared about me, the events of the past few days had allowed some doubt to creep up on me.

What if he didn't care and then shouted at me?

I knew Mike rarely shouted, but he was under stress at the moment and I didn't really want it directed at me.

I took a deep breath, before I walked into the office.

"Mike?"

"Morning, Tracy," said Mike, not even looking away from his computer screen where he was obviously working.

I sat down on the chair opposite him. "Could I possibly have a word?"

Mike sighed. "Can't you see I'm a little bit busy now?"

I took a deep breath to stop myself from crying. I really needed a hug from Mike, and it didn't look like I was going to get one. "Please?"

"Is it urgent?" asked Mike.

I wanted to say yes, wanted to talk to him immediately, but I knew it wasn't. "No."

"Well can you come back later then?" asked Mike. "Go check on the kids, see how they are after yesterday."

I sighed. The kids had had a huge bust up yesterday, and I didn't really want to have to get involved with it all again.

"What about me?"

I didn't mean to say that.

"What do you mean, what about you?" asked Mike.

"What about how I feel after yesterday?" I said.

"Well, we've got to put the kids first," said Mike.

I stood up. "I knew it!" I shouted. "I knew you didn't care!"

Mike stood up as well. "I didn't say that."

"Yes you did!" I shouted. "We have to put the kids first!"

"Well we do!" said Mike, his voice getting louder. "That's why we're here, isn't it?!"

"Yeah, but..." I paused for a moment. "You just don't care! You've barely spoken to me all week, you don't want to listen to what I've got to say, and it's just like you don't even want me here!"

The room was silent as I stood there, tears rolling down my cheeks. And, as Mike just stood there, I didn't know what to do.

I turned around and fled.

* * *

I ran to the toy cupboard, locking the door behind me. I didn't mean to, but as I realised it was the same place I'd been in my dream last night I hoped I'd get a similar reaction from Mike, one of care rather than anger.

I pulled my knees up to my chest as I sat on the floor, sobbing.

Just then I heard Mike's voice, calling my name. I just continued to cry, wanting him here and at the same time wanting him to just go away and leave me alone.

"Tracy?" called Mike. "Tracy, please answer me."

As he came outside the toy cupboard I tried to quieten my sobs, but it was no good.

"Tracy?" Mike asked, his voice much quieter. "Are you in there?"

I didn't answer, but my sobs answered his question.

Mike sighed and I heard him sit outside the door. "I'm sorry, Trace," he said. "You were right: I haven't been listening to you. But I am now. And if you want to tell me anything I'm right here."

I let out another sob. This was just like my dream. I wanted to open the door and run into Mike's arms, but at the same time I didn't know if I had the strength to.

"Why?" I said. "You haven't bothered the rest of the week."

"Because I care about you," said Mike.

"Everyone says that, but they never show it." I said.

They were the same words as in my dream.

"I will, if you'll let me," said Mike. "I'm here for you, and nothing's going to change that."

I let out another sob, curling myself up smaller as the emotional pain hit me. I then reached up and unlocked the door. Mike was silent as he opened it, knelt down by me, and embraced me in a tight hug.

"Shh," said Mike as he held me tight. "It's OK, I'm here now. Shh."

"I just, feel like no one wants me," I said through my tears. "The kids hate me."

"Well, I want you," said Mike. "And the kids don't hate you. They're just not having the greatest time at the moment and are just taking it out on you. They don't mean it." He paused. "And I'm sorry. I should have listened to you, made sure you didn't feel lonely, made you feel wanted and loved. I just got busy."

"It's OK," I said. "I'm sorry too, for making a fuss."

Mike shook his head. "Don't be." He paused. "You're allowed to have feelings." He let out a small laugh. "Just try not to shout at me next time, hey?"

I nodded, relaxing onto Mike, my head lying on his chest.

"I won't leave until you want me to," said Mike. "And I'll make sure I listen to you from now on. You can come to me with anything and everything, and I'll be there." He paused as he looked down at me and gently wiped a tear from my cheek. "I'm not leaving, yeah?"

 _I'm not leaving, yeah?_

Mike had repeated the words in my dream.

And I believed him.

Everything was going to be OK.

No.

Everything _was_ OK.

 **A/N I hope you liked this second chapter. I actually had to write it nearly twice as I started and then didn't like it, so had to start it again. Please review. :-)**


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